My poor Dallas (my niece) posted this bog on her myspace and I stole it. It broke my heart when I read it but I can think back to that time in my life and I know how she feels. Poor baby..she will be 18 next month but she is still my baby and I hate for her to feel this way but what can I do? I can even handle the stressed about class thing but wanting to stay with her brother at high school broke my heart.
It is only the 4TH DAY of College and I already feel like a failure!! Algebra is so hard and Im in a BIG KID class so I dont want to look stupid but i keep tellin myself that there is older people in there that know just as much as I do but honestly its not helping at all. Psychology seems like its going to be fun but.. I dont remember very much from the Psychology class that I took last semester in High School!! I grew up to fast!! I wish I could be starting kindergarten with Alexis or going to dance class with Jillian!! I do not like being a big kid!! The other day when I took Kyle to his first day of school I started crying because I wanted to stay there with him and watch after him thats what I'm here for.. and you know what he didnt even want me to tell him bye he doesnt even need me any more but i need him and im older than him he just doesnt see it.. But my Mom let me tell you what she is the only reason I know I can get through college. She encourages me everyday she ALWAYS asks how she can help. I feel to dependent on her though. I dont want her to think I take advantage of her AWESOME writing ability lol or all the big words. And I feel like Im causing her alot more stress in her life than she already has. But my mom, she is my hero, the one I can always count on. And my dad he says he is proud of me for going to college but when he says it i just dont feel the enthusiasm that I want to feel. Oh well I guess thats just the way dads are. I keep telling myself that I can succeed and I will succeed but it really doesnt seem to be working.. Mom I know you will read this but I want you to talk to me about it in a comment I dont want to talk about it in person NOW you know what has been bothering me lol!
It is only the 4TH DAY of College and I already feel like a failure!! Algebra is so hard and Im in a BIG KID class so I dont want to look stupid but i keep tellin myself that there is older people in there that know just as much as I do but honestly its not helping at all. Psychology seems like its going to be fun but.. I dont remember very much from the Psychology class that I took last semester in High School!! I grew up to fast!! I wish I could be starting kindergarten with Alexis or going to dance class with Jillian!! I do not like being a big kid!! The other day when I took Kyle to his first day of school I started crying because I wanted to stay there with him and watch after him thats what I'm here for.. and you know what he didnt even want me to tell him bye he doesnt even need me any more but i need him and im older than him he just doesnt see it.. But my Mom let me tell you what she is the only reason I know I can get through college. She encourages me everyday she ALWAYS asks how she can help. I feel to dependent on her though. I dont want her to think I take advantage of her AWESOME writing ability lol or all the big words. And I feel like Im causing her alot more stress in her life than she already has. But my mom, she is my hero, the one I can always count on. And my dad he says he is proud of me for going to college but when he says it i just dont feel the enthusiasm that I want to feel. Oh well I guess thats just the way dads are. I keep telling myself that I can succeed and I will succeed but it really doesnt seem to be working.. Mom I know you will read this but I want you to talk to me about it in a comment I dont want to talk about it in person NOW you know what has been bothering me lol!
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3 comments:
Probably the hardest transition in life is growing up. She's gonna do fine cause I know this young lady and she's strong, she's wise beyond her years, and she's beautiful.
Bless her sweet heart! I don't think, though, that what she's feeling is abnormal, and she'll get through these growing pains, and homesickness (I hope!).
I remember my first week of college, I had to spend my birthday in my dorm room alone! It was so horrible. I kept asking myself what did I do? I'd just made such a horrible mistake, why couldn't I have just gone to PC ands stayed at home. But after that 1st week, I made a few friends and it wasn't so hard at all. It actually became fun, and its an experience that I'm proud to say I went through and was successful. She'll do great, just wait!
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